Category: faith

  • The Journey.

    I was already four hours into the journey and had only another 30 minutes left if all factors remained constant. Read: if I did not have to stop for a restroom break.

    I was determined to get there in exactly those 30 minutes and not a minute more. In the days leading up to this journey, I had prayed about the roads, the people I would meet, and just about as many things as I could think to cover in prayer. I was not as open-minded as Doris Day singing “Que Sera, Sera.” Instead, I engaged the power of my tongue to speak life into the journey. This journey was going to be smooth, and I was not negotiating.

    About two and a half hours in, I stopped to get gas. My first choice of gas stations was unavailable, so I redirected myself to the next one. I was doing my best not to focus on how much driving I had left because all that did was weary me. I would attempt to look only at the map, but my eyes kept exercising their free will and wandering toward the estimated arrival time. Between you and me, a lot of inner work was happening just to keep going.

    This was not the kind of road trip you plan with friends, where you get to stop and sightsee along the way. It wasn’t a daunting journey either. It was simply one that needed to be done.

    I was operating in faith.

    I had been summoned to a meeting. I had the choice to say no and ignore it, but I chose to exercise my free will, move in faith, and attend. And boy, am I glad I did!

    I learned something profound that I will share with you in a minute. But before I do, remember that God’s ways are not our ways. His ways are higher than ours. Whenever we pray for something, we must also pray for the eyes to see and recognize it when it comes, as well as the grace to handle it.

    Now, there have been plenty of times when I have wondered why the path to where I am going cannot just be a straight line. Like, are all these detours really necessary?

    I have come up with various explanations for them. Sometimes, perhaps, I have not asked God for guidance. Other times, I may have asked but failed to wait on Him for direction. I remind myself that God is not the author of confusion. He leads us when we allow Him to and learn to wait on Him.

    And then there is the story of the children of Israel. If you are not familiar with their story, they complained about just about everything. LOL. Their journey, which could have taken approximately 11 days (Deuteronomy 1:2), stretched into 40 years because of their disobedience and lack of faith, and that generation did not enter the Promised Land. I do not need to learn that lesson firsthand. I can learn from their experience.

    But as I drove and checked my GPS, I noticed something. The GPS had the route it was recommending, but it also showed another route that could get me to my destination with less traffic.

    If you and I are anything alike, you might be surprised that a GPS would even think you would choose any other option than the one with less traffic. Like, why wasn’t that the recommended route to begin with?

    I loved this alternative route. The roads had traffic lights, which meant I could slow down and stop. I could take in my surroundings instead of going pedal to the metal on the highway, with my gluteal muscles tensed as I tried to overtake other vehicles and match the speed of traffic while making sure I wasn’t going so fast that I received a personal greeting from a state trooper.

    I was enjoying the different landscapes along the way. I got to appreciate the architecture of homes tucked away in their own little worlds. I imagined visiting restaurants that looked especially inviting under the lights. And most importantly, I stopped fixating on my arrival time.

    Suddenly, it came to me.

    God orchestrates our journey called life. He has a path for us, a plan that existed long before we came to be. There is an appointed time for everything, and when we are aligned with His plan, the journey itself can become an adventure.

    His path has trees, traffic lights, and different towns, each with its own requirements and opportunities to build on our experiences. Some of those experiences do not feel fun AT ALL while we are going through them. Some are thrilling. And some feel like floating on a flamingo floatie in a pool with a watermelon fresca in your hand.

    And even when we take detours, He is merciful enough to lead us back.

    This journey reminded me to appreciate the experiences and lessons I encounter along the way, rather than focusing merely on getting THERE.

    When my only focus is getting there, I miss the beauty surrounding me. I miss the lessons. I miss the moments that might be shaping me into the person I need to become.

    And when I finally get THERE, what then?

    May God help you and me learn to keep our eyes on Him. May we trust His direction, appreciate the lessons along the way, and extend ourselves the grace to embrace the journey, even when it looks different from what we expected.

    For He will guide us through.

    Until next time.

    Love,
    Jo.

  • Let’s Count to 100.

    Let’s Count to 100.

    There I sat, feigning sleep in an attempt to put both of them to sleep.

    They were twins. We had a busy morning filled with made-up games—as they all are—running around, sitting down, and doing this and that until it was time for a nap. I was under the impression that, after all that rigorous movement, surely the children would be in dreamland as soon as their heads hit the pillows.

    Well, that was an adorable little assumption.

    Surely, They Would Sleep

    After carefully placing both of them in their individual cribs and whispering, “Time for a nap,” I sat between the cribs on a pillow and closed my eyes.

    This was me demonstrating what time it was. But before I could even say Jack Robinson, I heard them whisper.

    They then proceeded to stand, jump as though on a trampoline, and free-fall onto their mattresses.

    My lesson on taking turns seemed to hit the wall while we played with toys. Or so I thought. They had exhibited such prowess in waiting patiently for their turn to engage in contrary activities. It was as though they were testing to see if I had mastered my other class in “waiting.”

    They almost called my bluff.

    But through prayer—MUCH PRAYER—I settled on waiting patiently. I knew that they would eventually wear themselves out and sleep.

    They did. Eventually. It only took a millennium.

    Now, I have been told I have extraordinary patience, which I credit to the Holy Spirit. However, on this particular day, I was struggling to engage that patience.

    The days prior to this had been rough. I had not been attaining maximum rest. As they giggled and flopped onto their mattresses, with the spring attached to the bed giving them a cheer, I kept asking God to please settle them down.

    After some time, one of them finally gave up and slept. I remember whispering a thank you, followed by a prayer request to have her sister sleep too.

    Her sister, on the other hand, had other plans.

    I kept praying, and I remember almost giving up.

    I started to make peace with the fact that I was not going to get both of them to sleep. But before I gave up, I made one last prayer that changed something.

    I said, “God, I am going to count to 50, and if she is still jumping, I will get her out of her bed and go.”

    I had been holding pee with the hope that it would not take them long to sleep. It never did—until today.

    So, I began counting.

    The closer I got to 50, the more her jumping intensified.

    In hindsight, I think the intensity of her jumping might not have actually changed. However, because I was focused on the jumping and on how soon she would stop, anything that was not the result I desired felt exaggerated.

    Before I got to 50, I felt the nudge to count until 100. That was my last offer.

    I kept counting and was determined to stop at 100, but something in me did not want to give up, so I kept counting beyond 100.

    To what end? I did not know.

    She still was not asleep.

    She would pause her jumping, and just when I thought my patience had finally paid off, she would stand up and free-fall onto her back.

    At this point, something in me had changed.

    I had stayed, and I was no longer counting. Suddenly, I heard a voice tell me:

    “Your timing is not My timing.”

    I leaned in, and what followed was guidance. God was guiding me to stop focusing on the sound of what seemed to not be working and fix my eyes on Him.

    Attempting to focus on God felt like rolling a stone up a hill because all I could hear was her free-falling.

    I asked God for help to fix my eyes on Him, and He pointed out that I needed to be willing to receive His help.

    I could only receive His help if I released every other thing. This included my focus on what looked like a disappointment.

    With the help of the Holy Spirit, I managed not to focus on the sound for a minute, then two. Then the duration of my focus on being still kept getting longer and longer.

    I would drift to the sound, then quickly strive to get back to stillness.

    By the time I noticed there was no more sound coming from her flopping, my focus had changed.

    She had finally slept.

    I opened my eyes and gave thanks to God before quickly dashing to relieve my bladder.

    The Lesson

    This moment was so profound to me because, in that moment, God refreshed the lesson of fixing my eyes on Him.

    He reminded me that even when I pray and wait on Him, there will be noises trying to distract me from the goal.

    God is able.

    If He does not do something, it is not because He is unable to do it. He may simply be saying, “Wait,” or “No.”

    But in everything, His ways are higher than ours, and our timing is not His timing.

    What was done in 10 years, God can do for you in a minute.

    It is easy to say, “Wait on the Lord.” But when the testing comes to see if we really are about what we say, then we get to find out if we, too, are about what we speak.

    What I Took Away

    I was reminded that waiting is not the same as doing nothing.

    Sometimes, waiting means staying.

    Sometimes, it means praying.

    Sometimes, it means resisting the urge to react to every noise around you.

    And sometimes, it means fixing your eyes on God when everything around you is telling you to do otherwise.

    The twins taught me something that day: my frustration did not change the timing, but changing my focus changed my experience of the waiting.

    I am here today to remind you to fix your eyes on God.

    Wait patiently on Him.

    And lean not on your own understanding.

    With Love,

    Jo.

  • The one where she was still…

    It felt like time was moving at sloth’s speed. Her body was feeling what the English men and women so colourfully described as ‘general malaise’ which caused her to be mildly intolerant of anything. This included work except that she actually had to show up to work. Well. She would later discover that she did not HAVE to , she just chose to show up at work. She shelved that realization of choice for unboxing later.

    There she sat in her car in the driveway not having the slightest motivation to go into the house. She sat there watching the very grey skies that had quickly gathered dimming the natural light. Tiny droplets of rain started to fall on her car’s windshield when her friend called. She surrendered to this moment;flowing and not resisting what was. After speaking words of encouragement to each other she hung up the call and continued to watch the sky. She had always loved nature because in It she found God. This moment felt so powerful. In that moment she was still.

    The droplets were but few and soon after she started to notice the dark grey  clouds moving away, and slowly the rays of sun started to move past the clouds as one would draw curtains and with no fight the clouds obliged. The sun came out and warmed the earth again to the point of burning her forehead as she stepped out of her car. This moment reminded her how quickly things can change when she remained still and kept her eyes on her maker.

    It is written in the word of God, be still and I will fight for you, I will strengthen you and help you. God is not limited by time. It may look like it’s getting darker and maybe it is. Not only that but it might start pouring too! You may have thought that God would at least keep the sun shining and not let it grey but now not only did he let it grey but he let the rain start to pour too! You might have wondered where the one who watches over your coming and going was when it started to get thick. The truth of the matter is , he is and was still in it. The minute you call out to him he shows up.

    When we fix our eyes on the one who made the earth and everything and everyone in it things start to move. God shifts things so quickly because our eyes are on him. Fully trusting that he can get us through anything and being God can he fail?You trust him to carry you through it. He has never failed and he will not start with you. Fix your eyes on him and enter his rest.

    May Elohim remind you who you are and whose you are today. You are so precious, so dearly loved that there had to death so you could be saved! Put your head up. You are more than a conqueror!!

    Until next time,

    Love Jo.